Thursday, February 26, 2009


I've had this happen too often lately. I'm taking a nuanced stance about something, and a person involved in the discussion says one of the following:

1. You're throwing out the baby with the bathwater.
No I'm not, I never said to throw out any bathwater. I'm bringing some nuance to the discussion.

2. You're contradicting yourself.
No I'm not, I'm showing that, in fact, this is not a matter of absolutes. That's what I said at the beginning.

3. Sometimes the other discussant simply starts arguing against a point I never made because they assume that if I believe X, I must believe Y.
I'm not even sure how to respond to that one.

Conclusion 1: I need a fucking vacation.
Conclusion 2: This is why I hate "discourse."


Ann Forstie said...

Why are you so anti-bathwater?? ;)

Seriously, though, I hear you. Sometimes people just don't get nuance. I want to stare at them and say, "What is it about complexity that you don't understand?"

Also, I believe in contradicting oneself on occasion. Not that you were (in whatever you were discussing) -- just that it's less than a sin. I mean, I've believed as many as six hypocritical things before breakfast.

In other news: It's almost spring! With the flowers and greenery and temperate temperatures! Just a few more weeks to go!

kStyle said...

Yes! I believe in Food Democracy, local, organic, etc., but I totally eat McDonald's apple pies or vanilla ice cream whenever I get the craving.

Also, I think I'm just more interested in how to live an individual good life than a good life as a society. I've had to debate a lot of society-level issues lately...

Yes, spring! My sinuses are totally acting up, and the weather is warmer and the birds are chirping! Hurray! Pass the FloNase!

Ann Forstie said...

Society-level issues are difficult for me, too. It's hard to argue about something about which individual people can't do very much. You can have opinions about it, and you can offer criticisms and suggestions, but in the end, it's all words. Words are great, but they don't get very much done.

kStyle said...

Yes! Also, I'm not presumptuous enough to state that what works for ME also works for YOU and for HIM and HER and all of THEM.

So, I guess I'm pretty down with democracy, and let's leave it at that.