Thursday, August 7, 2008

Who I Am

I had a secret goal this summer: I wanted to become an athlete. I wanted to become one of those toned ladies who says, "I'm so glad I was able to get into this weekend's 5K up in Salem. I mean, I registered really last minute, but coming down from the triathalon Saturday, I felt like I needed an easy race just to feel good."

I work with these people. Some of them run 5Ks with their families on holidays. On holidays! Holidays are for eating, talking, noshing, eating, and playing ladder horseshoes with a drink in one hand. On July 4 it is also acceptable to play volleyball with cousins, provided there are no volleys whatsoever. The game must be played in a strict serve-miss-serve format. Anything else is unAmerican. Winter and fall holidays may include spectator sports and/or marathon games of Scrabble.

Although tracking my food intake, amping up the exercise, and reading Healthy Magazines have been good and fun for me, and I will continue to do them, I fear I will never become the Supra Athlete Woman of my June-July imagination. Reality settles in during August, and that reality says, 'Style, you are not this person. If you're honest, you don't even want to be this person. You just want to be in good enough shape to canoe and stroll through apple orchards during fall foliage.

I'm not a marathoner. A friend of mine ran a marathon and--cross my heart and hope to die--all her toenails turned black and fell out the next day, but she proclaimed, "I can't wait to run my next marathon!" This gal would also work until 11 PM at her crappy editorial assistant job on a regular basis. Now, of course, she is in law school. I am not like this determined young woman. In a test that a life coach friend suggested I take, I learned that "Leisure" is one of my top-three goals in life. My ideal weekend may involve some good sweating from dance, yoga, hiking, and sex, but it never, ever involves any running.

Nor am I like those women who thrive on the challenge! of beating a competitor. I don't relish the notion of beating my own best performance, either--why make myself my own enemy? I prefer cooperation to competition (not that it's a competition). My goals in life revolve around making the house smell like cinnamon as often as possible, and having delectable cups of tea and magical racks of muffins ready for unexpected visitors (who never arrive, so we just eat 'em or fatten up coworkers on Monday). I like to sit and meditate. I like to socialize, especially at the Friday night Nia theme parties we have at the studio. (Later in August--a James Bond dance night!) On special occasions, we may even enjoy a potluck supper and break out the djembes after we finish dancing.

I am not the six-pack gal.

I much prefer a good, inexpensive vinho verde.


Larry Jones said...

And this is why I love you.

kStyle said...

Love you too, Larry.

Ann Forstie said...

Excellent post, excellent realization. It's always nice to step back every once in a while and ask, "OK, why am I doing this again?" And if you can't come up with a reason that makes sense to you, reconsider doing it at all.

kStyle said...

Thanks, Ann. Yeah, running....why?

Narya said...

Despite my fondness for various sporting activities, and my history of participation in actual competitions, I, too, like the beer and lounging (and am about to head off for a weekend full of same). And running . . . oy. Hate it. Or, rather, my knees hate it. They don't hate handball, but they do hate jogging.

Narya said...

Incidentally, though, I actually see the appeal of a marathon. A. Because there's something kind of cool about setting a goal like that and doing it. But multiple marathons? No. Never.

kStyle said...

Narya: Running hurts my knees, too. But volleyball is just fine.

I see the appeal of setting a big goal and completing it. I do. And I love watching the Olympics, but I'm always glad it's not me out there doing the butterfly.